* hi. it’s new year’s eve and as i was prioritizing my resolutions (yes, plural) and my game plan to actually achieve them, i stopped being so hard on myself for a minute and thought about how nice it has been to have had some time off over the holidays. sleeping in, drinking tea in my underwear, seeing friends and family with whom i don’t get to spend as much time as i would like – it’s been lovely. we all feel pressure and responsibility that sometimes presses in and weighs down on us in ways we aren’t even aware. maybe it’s work, or school, or relationships. sometimes we have to feel relief before we realize how things in life are affecting us.
i evaluated from what i felt relief. what trees had been distracting me from seeing the forest? maybe it’s not that things or people cause us stress, but how we let them affect us. maybe i needed a healthy dose of the big picture.
when a person leaves their role in a company, he or she leaves a void. depending on how much the others in the company were dependant on he or she, the void could be small or gapingly large. perhaps he or she is integral to the balance of personalities. perhaps known as more than a co-worker – even a friend. but eventually the void seals up like a wound. some wounds are bad, like gashes that need stitches or broken bones that need a cast. some wounds are just scrapes and bruises that barely need a band-aid. regardless, the company heals. it may take new form, but the show goes on. stuff gets done.
my point, i suppose, is there’s you and then there’s the stuff. the work. grades. other people. life goes on no matter how bumped and bruised you allow yourself to get in the process. there will always be stuff. there won’t always be you. it’s best to try and keep you and the stuff separate. internalizing all the stuff will only cause detriment to, well, all the you.
so, the resolution on the top of my list is to separate myself from the stuff so i can have the drinking tea in my underwear feeling all the time, no matter the circumstance. how, you may ask, do i plan to achieve this?
i will tell myself the following:
1) “we’re not saving babies.” i wonder what people who save babies tell themselves.
2) “how do you eat an elephant? one bite at a time.” my dad told me that. it’s a goodie.
3) “you are replaceable.” we like to think otherwise, but this is true in all scenarios. some may find it depressing. i find it oddly comforting.
4) “be like duck.” let everything roll like water over greasy feathers.
and if all else fails…
k *
